I miss them, My demons. Glint eyes Sulphuric softened Voices, smooth As aged whisky, And as golden To the skin. The dare issued In the stare, two Seconds too long Cascading adrenalin, Clearing clogged Arteries. He said, I should resist Invoking future glories Of Christian masculinity. But I could never See the point Future possibilities A poor reward For the potential Of present pleasures He said...
Is the silence behind the smile, The slight of distraction to Keep momentum outwards Never inwards. Grey mists of grief Roiling behind layers of Skin, steeled and shuttered Bulwarked against scalded tears. I have learnt the weight Of this darkness, a darkness No pinprick star of love Can penetrate. This darkness It is best, not to break the stillness with dreams of hope. Yet a slender string Of...
I was fed a lie Suckled on illusions Of sanctity suffocating My stifled humanity The all-seeing eye Of a God, choked thoughts That gagged on the nipple Of holiness but not wholeness I wonder what He thought, as He Watched, fear Smother my humanity Love perverted By parameters of ideologies The certainties of dogma’s Making it easier For His drones Castrated by their fear To warm themselves at The...
It always starts with hi Innocuously friendly, Social niceties minimalised Then discarded as tersely And succinctly possible. What you are doing, and Whether you are “good” I couldn’t care Less Will you be My illusion? I don’t need you For long. Twenty minutes Should do, to reach that Sigh, when my Body relaxes. After all A warm body Is better than a Flat screen But I need to know, No offence...
I believed him When he said Perfection was possible And sanctity The path. The magnificence Of perfection Celestial music To a runt, precarious In his place But he, omitted And not from ignorance To tell, The toll, mandated By perfection I set off Resolute But, naïve Of the price She would extract She stripped me Of my demons, Castrating them or Perhaps, it was me, A gelding for perfection Now I...
I walk This path Empty But for dust balls Of shame I have prayed For redemption But from what? I am Still unsure The rosary Of my prayers Countless And still Unanswered Silence Shadows me As I walk This empty Dust filled path. Pray, they say God answers. Wishful thinking Made powerful By repetition. Yet in the Silence that surrounds me No answer Is given And I walk This path, my Path of shame...
They went From here to there Though where there Was, I didn’t know Two tracks Imprinted on Heavy-dewed Grass Footprints Side by side Not close enough To be lovers Though, perhaps Lovers, tired Of closeness Needing space I, on my way Saw their footsteps Brief witness to them Passing this way. For soon Sun dried grass Will ghost their footsteps And none will know There were two tracks Footsteps...
Rain drops Drum with Rhythmic certainty. Disconnected patterns Of accidental Design, thrum In my mind. I lie Suspended between Two states, waiting While thoughts Subside into neural Swamps of Slumber It is, in The in-between, In between thoughts In between falling drops There is A second of Stillness Not the stillness Of nothingness Rather, the Stillness of Silence. Eternity’s Inbreathing The...
It came back to me From years Long gone, Faint memory Mouldering under The crow-cold Beady-eyed Judgemental Father Memory Emasculated By the Cryogenically Frozen Crone Still, It came back to me From years Long gone. Resurrected, Though perhaps It never Died Just buried In fear. Yet, I Have walked With death, And kissed Santa Muerte. I have survived The grey necrosis Of vapid gayness Masquerading...
Light on leaves
In the silence
Of the before
Wrapped in the
Of the Divine’s