Soliloquy to Ennui

They say when talking to oneself
One should ensure another does not hear
In case the hearer thinks the speaker mad
So I will write my thoughts
And they shall be a witness
To my madness
The madness of ennui
This thing that has infected me
A dreadful dreary apathy
I should be man enough to shake it off
But it has its grip on me.
An indifferent tediousness
A weary apathy
Cocoons and suffocates me
I stand under sapphire blue sky
And roses confused blooming full
In autumn spring warmth
Trees a riot of richness
Coinage of colour
The warming embrace of sun on skin
And I?
Perhaps monk like
I will withdraw
In the solitude of grey stone wall
And daily rites of penitence
Perhaps then my surfeited soul
Starved, can once again enjoy
The riches of this world
Perhaps the richness of beauty
The bountiful profligacy of nature
Excess exceedingly overpowering
Leaves my soul engorged
And ennui
The fevered response

Of a soul in recovery.

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